Key Signs of an Abusive Pastor #3: Overly Critical and Harsh with Others

I’m continuing my blog series on spiritual abuse in the church which I am calling “Bully Pulpit”. You can see the prior installments here , here, and here. Since spiritual abuse is not as easy to spot as other forms of abuse, I am working my way through a number of key signs that churches should be on the watch for.
We come now to a third sign of a spiritually abusive pastor, namely that they are known for being overly critical and harsh with those under them. As Chuck DeGroat observes in his book, When Narcissism Comes to Church, abusive pastors are known for … Continue reading...
Key Signs of an Abusive Pastor #1: A Long Track Record of Broken Relationships

I’ve been making my way through a new blog series on spiritual abuse in the church which I am calling “Bully Pulpit”. In the prior installment, I offered a definition of spiritual abuse:
Spiritual abuse, then, is when a spiritual leader—such as a pastor, elder, or head of a Christian organization—wields his position of spiritual authority in such a way that he manipulates, domineers, bullies, and intimidates those under him, as a means of accomplishing what he takes to be biblical and/or spiritual goals.
But just having a definition doesn’t answer all our questions. After all, there’s a level of subjectivity in applying this definition. Some may think … Continue reading...
Bully Pulpit: A New Series on the Rising Problem of Spiritual Abuse in the Church

Scut Farkus.
When it comes to movie bullies, perhaps he is one of the most famous. In the classic film A Christmas Story (1983), the red-headed Scut—wearing a coonskin cap and flanked by his shorter partner in crime, Grover Dill—would often torment young Ralphie and his brother on the way home from school.
The reason this movie (and this scene in particular) resonated with audiences is because people can relate. Most everyone grew up knowing a bully in their school; someone who would intimidate, threaten, and domineer the other kids.
Indeed, bullies are part of the human experience. So prevalent, in fact, that one could easily make a list of … Continue reading...
5 Leadership Lessons I Learned from Ted Lasso

Looking back on 2020, it seemed like all news was bad news. We moved from impeachment to the coronavirus to the killing of George Floyd to the presidential election to multiple church leadership scandals and back to the coronavirus again.
But sometimes it’s the little things that bring some hope and optimism when we’re feeling down. On that note, 2020 was the perfect year for the new show on AppleTV, Ted Lasso.
The comedy catalogs the journey of a warm-hearted American football coach, Ted Lasso (played by Jason Sudeikis) who is hired to coach a soccer team in the English Premier League—despite having never played (or apparently watched) … Continue reading...